Recently I had the idea to write a post equating zodiac signs to different tools. How hard could it be? Very hard, as is turns out. Enormous gratitude to Matt Sheridan, Sharon Kihara, Aakriti Malhotra, Tatianna Morales, and Daddi Longlegz for your suggestions and helping me wrap my head around the topic.
You need the means to rally the troops and that’s why you have three settings: loud, louder and siren. Why spend a day driving nails alone when more work will get done if everyone around you picks up a hammer? Yeah, you’re a ram but there’s no sense banging your head against a wall. You know the best skill isn’t knowing how to do something but getting the right people do the job. Are you discreet? No. You can’t trust someone who whispers. You lay it all out there knowing full well that you’ll annoy and inspire in equal measure.
You solve problems like you hug, with patience and an iron grip. You define a problem then ease into position, applying gentle, unyielding, leverage until either the pressure is released or something breaks. There are flashier ways to get things done - kitchen sink tools that will file, trim, measure, cut, poke, punch and sew - but that’s not your style. You’d rather be the best there is at one thing. You’re a specialist and there’s no one better than you at what you do.
You can do it all. Yeah, there are better people at almost everything you do but how often is a specialist really needed? We’re not all building houses, engineering complicated mechanical systems or tailoring suits. For most people the best tool is the one that solves a problem quickest and you’re solving real life issues, every day, for everyone around you. From morning to night you’re, cutting, screwing, tightening and opening beers. You’re low maintenance and travel well. If there’s one tool, one friend, that can be counted on for solutions it’s you.
To the casual observer you might be a variation of wrench but the people who know you would never underestimate your value. You tighten nuts and bolts, pinch, grab, strip wire and even hammer nails. You’re good at what you do but respond best when the people around you are committed to the task at hand. The more energy they apply the more efficient you become. Outwardly you seem simple but there’s an intimidating complexity to the sheer number of ways you can be helpful.
You’re radiant, you’re warm and you live for the spotlight. In fact, life is better when you are the spotlight - that sharp circle of illumination focusing people’s attention where you want. Everything is clearer in black and white, right? There’s no gray area, just the important things, lovingly illuminated and, well…the stuff in the shadows that doesn’t matter. You love a challenge and work best when times are dark. That’s when people most need a leader to show them the path to safety. There’s nothing like conflict to reveal a person’s character in sharp relief and leaders are remembered for the challenges they overcame.
The world is a messy place. Relationships are fuzzy and communication is inherently sloppy. Tell ten people to imagine a blue sky and they’ll all visualize a different blue. From the mess of life you extract the patterns that are most useful and predictable. Through the collection of this data you demystify complex problems, breaking them down into chunks whose value can be easily understood. As a creative you are often underestimated. At your peak you are an alchemist, transforming sprawling ideas into manageable components and converting them into a thing of ordered, cubist beauty.
A strong foundation is the key to lasting balance. This requires patience and precise measurements but the time spent doing it well is worth the investment. It’ll cost more to repair something down the road then it will to do it right the first time. There’s an elegance to simple, uncomplicated shapes that are classic in their beauty and inspire a sense of unity; a perfectly straight line, a beautifully proportioned square, the grace of an enclosed circle. Like the bubble in a level you may wobble on some things but you don’t compromise when it comes to quality. Perfection is worth the wait.
With proper care you are a lifetime companion. Laymen don’t understand your depth but in skillful hands you are an essential companion. You’ll chop, hammer, slice, and dig through a weekend camping trip, a day of hard labor or the zombie apocalypse. Outwardly you’re calm and collected but sometimes you just need to unload and, when that happens, you’re a force to be reckoned with. Knives break, hammers wince, and shovels pale at the work that doesn’t make you blink. Depending on your mood you’re either saving lives or people’s worst nightmare.
You’ve seen it all. You’re an optimist, a dreamer who is always looking to the horizon for the next adventure or to the sky for answers. Sharing is second nature but you keep your distance because freedom is more important than any attachment. You’re more comfortable with wind and sails than anchors. You see things clearly and don’t hesitate to speak your mind. The truth may be painful but, hey, that’s the price of clarity. Some feelings will be hurt and it's not your fault some people aren’t prepared to see reality. Time is relative when your focus is on the big picture. You may not always be on time but, in time, you will always arrive.
The best work doesn’t always happen during business hours. You never know when an opportunity will present itself so you’re prepared 24/7 to send an email, leverage contacts, or schedule an important meeting. Your white collar may not be stained with paint but you’re a master artist when it comes to making things happen. There’s no sense in sorting personal and professional contacts because the distinction is meaningless. You’re mobile, self-sufficient and help is only a phone call away if you find yourself in over your head. When your focus is always on the next opportunity you sometimes miss the joy of the moment but you need to keep looking forward to see where you’re going.
Big ideas flow from you like water. Some people balk when confronted by limitless possibilities but you love breaking down big problems and defining the perimeters for exploration. You have a gift for linking concepts to create something unexpected. You belong up front, guiding the conversation, brainstorming and giving shape to new ideas. Seeing your concepts changed by the reality of budgets, timelines and committee is painful so you try to detach yourself from actual production, you prefer other people to handle the mundane and frustrating details of execution. The creative process itself is noble but you seek something higher: you want to change the world for the better.
You are the living, breathing, gosh-darned embodiment of adaptability. Simplicity is your beauty - some adhesive and some stretch - that’s all you need. There’s nothing like the power of constraints for creative problem solving and you solve more problems across more situations than nearly anyone. While you’re the master of the quick fix, and you genuinely want to help, your solutions may not stand the test of time. There’s always someone with more knowledge and deeper specialization with a more permanent solution don’t let it get you down. People don’t come to you for deep answers they come for quick solutions. And you’ve got rolls of those.